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Kati Gardner: Finding Balance (2020, North Star Editions) 5 stars

Review of 'Finding Balance' on 'Goodreads'

5 stars

Thank you to Netgalley and Flux Books for my eARC of Kati Gardner's 'Finding Balance'.

I was initially drawn to the book because when I was in school my close friend passed from Leukemia. I have also had family members these last couple of years fighting forms of Cancer and I welcomed any book that might give a perspective about this cruel disease that would help my children.

Finding Balance was everything I could have hoped for in a book that deals with topics that are often not in the forefront of any novels never mind those for a younger audience. I had moments of laughter, and moments were I cried; the emotional rollercoaster had me at every turn and I know without doubt I would and will read this tale again along with the first book by Kati Gardner.

It is an insightful read both during both the good moments and the bad and it was apparent that this story truly mattered to the author and that it was a true labour of love. The scenes at 'Camp Chemo' were wonderful and showed how anyone can feel more 'themselves' when surrounded by others who truly understand what they have gone through. I think all too often, childhood Cancer is shown about the fragility of the sufferer and not so much the survivor who simply wants to be who they are or where before they got sick. I couldn't help but laugh at how our two main protagonists were your typical teenagers who had crushes on one another - especially how Jase doesn't even register the fact Mari is an amputee, she is just his friend and her only have one leg doesn't affect how he sees her. I confess that there were smiles and tears as it is abundantly clear that to him, she is still so beautiful to him - as it should be.

Although Finding Balance's main characters are both Cancer survivors I liked how there was so much more to the story than just that. You saw how people judge others all too often by how someone looks than rather who they are; something we are all often guilty of doing.

It was interesting seeing Mari's battle in regards to whether she should have another prosthetic leg or be as she is when we meet her using her hot pink crutches and having her old prosthetic as a 'very expensive doorstop'. Her refusal to essentially make others more comfortable with her disability by going through the painful process to be fitted for a leg had me cheering her on. She is only sixteen but a true warrior and very comfortable with who she is and what she needs to make her life better. I found myself wanting to hug this fictional girl and cheer her on as she acknowledges how she is so much more than a leg that hasn't been there longer than it was. Her vulnerabilities are obviously still there but she fights through them and is an excellent role model for anyone who finds themselves in that situation.

I felt for Jase whose demons linger in the back of his mind and make him reticent to be truthful to his friends. His determination to keep the two parts of his life separate from one another is a hard thing to do but also a very human thing when we're afraid. His Cancer doesn't so much haunt him but the cruelty of children who don't fully understand, (thinking it is contagious for example). However, he does deserve everything he gets when he treats Mari the way he does and I can guarantee you will feel the same.

I am wary of ruining the story with too many spoilers, but I will say that if you want an emotional insightful and wonderful story of love, of life and the fragility of being human? Finding Balance is a must for your to be read pile. I am eager to read more from Kati Gardner.