Nonviolent Communication

If you are anything like me, you have attempted to compassionately negotiate through a difficult problem with a loved one only to realize that the way you speak makes the process more difficult. While attempting to express yourself and find solutions you make moralistic judgments, surrender your autonomy to authority, make demands, or just try to "fix" the situation. Predictably, negotiations fail and everyone is mad.

Marshall Rosenberg's Nonviolent Communication may be the key to helping people in conflict realize they have the same goal: the thriving of life.

Rosenberg narrates the Nonviolent Communication audiobook (slpl.bibliocommons.com/item/show/12382448981), and listening to him for about 5 hours would help you learn strategies to bring yourself and the people around you into greater harmony. However, if you'd like to try it first, follow the instructions below:

When someone's actions impact you negatively state a feeling, a need, and then a request. Your vulnerability should disarm any attraction to violent solutions and attract all parties towards harmony.

Once you get past the first chapter, the book is chock full of compelling ways to think about and change your communication. It's not an easy process, you have to really want to connect to other humans and be willing to be honest and open with them. But if you are at all interested in how to use your language and communication to really connect with others rather than categorize and divide yourself from them, this will help you immensely.